Wednesday 22 February 2017

SPRING 2017 BIG GAME - THE SCENARIO


"THE APRIL FOOLS DAY MASSACRE"

otherwise known as

“THE COUNTY CUP”


It’s a Very British Civil War, and what could be more Very British than a very temporary truce for a bracing day’s charity event at the Hereford Golf Club (in aid of the County Widows and Orphans Fund)?

Invitations to participate in “The County Cup Charity Challenge” have been accepted by all notable personages in Hereford’s VBCW. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, the greens are freshly mown; but clearing the fairways and woods of all the detritus of the VBCW has proved far beyond the resources of Sir Alan McGuffin (Chairman of the Club) and his Committee of County worthies. Ammo dumps, broken down or under repair vehicles, hidden supplies or abandoned war materials still litter the course, ready and waiting to surprise (or delight) each and every player - and it’s every player for himself.

That’s right - it’s every player for himself. With the County Cup at stake and the whole of Fleet Street watching, command structures are put to one side, factional allegiances unravel and old alliances dissolve (or perhaps reform in unexpected ways). The winner can expect a morale boosting bout of national publicity and the special favour of the King/the Prime Minister/the Archbishop of Canterbury/the Kremlin/the Eisteddfod/the local Landowners (as you will) - even if he has to beat “one of his own” to claim the prize.

Sir Alan had expected his guests to arrive with only a caddie and a bag of clubs for company. But trust is in short supply, and the truce is only very temporary. The Committee look on in horror as each player attends the course with his own combat ready retinue of well-armed “supporters and well-wishers”.  Some - in fact, the majority - have had the temerity to bring along tanks, tankettes, armoured cars (“that’s my golf buggy for the day, Sir Alan, don’t worry”), troops of cavalry (“just in case I slice it, old chap - damn’ useful for finding a lost ball”) and even field guns (“a little insurance, don’t you know?”).

As each player “tees off”, Sir Alan and his now terrified Committee gather around the County Cup. The Club Secretary consults the Rules of Golf, but there seems nothing to cover “blowing up an opponent”, “replacing the ball in the event of a massacre”, or “playing through a party with superior firepower”. Just one misunderstanding amongst the players, and this could all go most horribly wrong.

Fore!

A shout of the traditional golfer’s warning, and universally misinterpreted.

“Fire!” “Fire!” “Fire, goddamit!” (this last one clearly wasn’t an Anglican). Sir Alan’s truce is abandoned by universal consent. The Hereford Golf Club dissolves into the chaos of our renewed Civil War. As Fleet Street’s finest look on, the County Cup waits to be seized by the victor. And there can only be one….


The County Widows and Orphans Fund thank you for your contribution to their continuing work.

Spring 2017 BIG GAME

The Hereford1938 AVBCW Spring Big Game is ON! With regrets communicated from one or two of the campaign's notorious characters (for example, Captain Arrowsmith is said to be "conducting staff conversations with Mussolini", and Sir Gilbert Hill is understood to be "investigating whether Cthulhu possesses a Behemoth"), we already know we will be welcoming back both old irregulars (Bonjour, Monsewer Crapaud!) and some new campaigners (hello Craig and Neil!). 

A Big Game "Flyer" - copy and send or direct other interested parties to this post
For those who have not previously attended a Hereford1938 "Big Game", the Burley Gate Village Hall is located on the A465 between Burley Gate Roundabout and the village of Stoke Lacy. The Village Hall is adjacent to the Burley Gate Primary School. Full information and a helpful PDF map may be found here. The cost for the day is maintained at the usual £10, payable on the BIG DAY itself.

The Scenario for the BIG DAY SPRING 2017 follows. Shortly it will be revealed precisely why Edward VIII is dressed not for the customary "Sport of Kings", but for an intensely relaxed round of golf....


AVBCW Situation Map (No.11)

As Hereford1938 ("TOS") gently gives way to Hereford1938 ("TNG") those interested in the continuing campaign may wish to refresh their memories of the present state of play:

Hereford1938 VBCW Situation Map No.11
Situation Map No.11 (broken down into Herefordshire's parishes as usual) is the last of the situation maps published on JP's blog and was compiled after the Battles of Aconbury, Whitney and Brimfield. A little further local news was published after Situation Map No.11 was compiled. Who knows what a future Situation Map No.12 may show?

AVBCW News - from a "Peace Envoy"

In dramatic scenes at Hereford Race Course Aerodrome today, the self appointed Civil War "Peace Envoy", Neville Chamberlain (formerly Chancellor of the Exchequer), announced to an expectant crowd of Herefordians that, contrary to rumours of "Peace in Our Time", the Hereford Very British Civil war would continue.

Neville Chamberlain - VBCW "Peace Envoy"-  at Hereford Race Course Aerodrome.
It is not peace in our time....the Hereford Campaign will continue!



The assembled multitude cheered heartily. Notwithstanding the already announced "changes at the top" [the graceful withdrawal, after four years work, of JP and Giles from organisation of the Hereford1938 campaign, and the introduction of "The Next Generation" of Clive and Roo], there were still scores to settle, advances to be made, defeats to be met with VBCW geniality, and (please choose one of the below, according to your sympathies):

(a). the County to be made safe for the rightful King Edward VIII and his BUF Government;
(b). such renegades to be overthrown and the British Constitution and Democracy restored.

The entire history of the Hereford 1938 campaign is set out in detail (as lavishly illustrated) within :JP's blog

Newcomers and those wishing to refresh their memories, please head over there now before reading on!

"Herefordshire: the final frontier. These are the games of the AVBCW crew. Their continuing mission: to explore strange new scenarios, to seek out dodgy geezers, and model Heath-Robinson contraptions, to boldly go where no gamer has sensibly gone before." A contemporaneous remark attributed to Sir Ed Ward-Glear, Leader of the Malvern Hills Conservators.