Tuesday 24 October 2017

AUTUMN BIG GAME 2017 - NEWS FROM THE NOT YET BATTLEFRONT

With the days counting down to the Autumn Big Game 2017 ("The Last of the Summer Wye"), news is coming in from all over Herefordshire (and well beyond) of the forces being assembled:

The Glorious (or Not) Commanders

The "Senior Commanders" have been announced! 

For the Fascist/Royalist Government Coalition, goosestep forward Storm Leader Giles (Giles) of the Three Counties BUF Legion, as "Senior Government Officer"! Last seen at BUF HQ being roundly abused by (the presently absent) Captain Arrowsmith after The Battle of Bredwardine Fords, the Storm Leader has seized this command opportunity! Will the County LDVs be impressed ?

For the Socialist (Very Broad) Alliance, raise a clenched fist to the "Senior Socialist Officer", Captain-Commissar Winters (Rob), Professor of History, noted radical, and 'veteran" of the Second Battle of Ledbury, where he enjoyed the dubious distinction of having his entire force killed, captured or routed by the BUF and Royalists. Subsequently arrested and confined in Aston Hall, Winters has recently managed to escape his imprisonment (with the kind assistance of the Communist Party of Great Britain) and has been appointed (again with the kind assistance of the CPGB) to his present exalted command position. Will the County LDVs allow him to erase the memory of the Second Battle of Ledbury? Should he fail, does he face 'liquidation" (again with the kind assistance of the CPGB, etc.,etc.) ?

For the Anglican Alliance, put your palms together in reverent attitude for the "Senior Anglican Officer", the Bishop of Ludlow (Clive)! Another junior leader promoted to overall command (in the absence of Captain-General Jermingham, Anglican C-in-C), has the recent victor of "The Two Bishops' Battle" at Brimfield got the true stuff of leadership? Will one of his notably lengthy sermons persuade sufficient County LDVs to the Anglican cause?

The County LDVs

Ten County LDVs are jockeying for position, influence and lots of cash from the Central Treasuries of the Glorious (or not) Commanders. But not all of them yet submitted Platoon Rosters! Come on, chaps!

Recipient of a "Special Umpire Bonus" for having already returned a beautifully completed Platoon Roster to Central HQ, Captain Morgan of the Hereford Local Defence Volunteers (consisting principally of "The Westfield Watchmen CC Gentlemens XI", "The Roman Road Irregulars" and the "Huntington Parish Honey Farmers Levy"), Captain Morgan (Craig) is sure to be much sought after by the Glorious Commanders. He now has the substantial benefit of being supported by none other than Sir Alan McGuffin, Chairman of the Hereford Golf Club, and his "McGuffinMobile", a vast and deadly Behemoth of splendid appearance, as driven by McCaddy, Sir Alan's chauffeur, general factotum and psycho-batman!

Scarcely likely to be less sought after, and equal recipients of "Special Umpire Bonuses", for having both read the scenario briefing early and actually undertaken some special modelling in consequence, the Umpires also have full Platoon Rosters already returned by Councillor Walter Cracknutt (Alan) of the Wormelow Tump Warriors LDV and the Hon. Felicia Goodbody (Rita) of the Fownhope Faithful LDV. Lady Felicia (cousin of the Blessed Rita Talbot-Ponsonby) has the benefit a mobile grenade launcher :

Mobile Grenade Launcher of the Fownhope Allotment Holders Association
and the formidable re-inforcement of a Lightly Armoured Car belonging to the Fownhope Shopkeepers:

The Fownhope Shopkeepers "Special Delivery Vehicle"
while Councillor Cracknutt has recruited an old pal (from Pentonville) of the well known Alfie Lightfinger of the Gas Street Irregulars, one Shorty McBisquett, Manager of the Wormelow Pest Control Company (in other guise, and only very allegedly, a notorious gang of County poachers) and their "Not Very Armoured" Car:

Shorty McBisquett's "Not Very Armoured" Car
There may yet be further helpful "Umpires Bonuses" for Platoon Rosters being returned - it is still not too late for the other LDV Commanders to get their kit together (and avoid the dreaded "Umpire Penalties"). Remember, the better your outfit, the more likely they will be to command "a premium" from the cash strapped "Glorious Commanders"....

Other News

And now for the other news. The Senior Socialist Officer has announced that he will have "some very special logistical supplies" for any LDV willing to join his cause (the supply of which may or may not be linked to the provision of a Communist Commissar to your own force). The Senior Anglican Officer is shortly to broadcast that he will be fielding "some new high technology equipment" and planning "brilliant new tactics" for any LDV ready to enter into "the service of the Almighty". The Senior Fascist Officer has confirmed he has read the scenario briefing, and is busily engaged in preparing an all new "Wyrd Force" for the Big Day...

The Very Very Real 1938 Relic is ready to be won, and all the items for the Special Voluntary Modelling Challenge are bagged up and ready. Umpire Clive is making roads. Umpire Roo is busy making hedges - er, lots and lots of hedges - and a whole lot else!