As the Bristol Fleet leaves port, heading north, clearly intent on traversing the coast of Wales on a 'punitive expedition' (now the worst kept secret in the Navy), the Admiralty has released "details of officers commanding" to the expectant newspapers of Fleet Street. Such biographies have clearly since been amended by various wags, hacks and low scribblers:
(1). ADMIRAL SIR MORTIMER
SILVERFLINT, CB, DSO and Bar
A long-serving naval officer from an old naval family, Sir Mortimer joined the service as a 14-year old midshipman, and later fought at Heligoland Bight in 1914 and the Dardanelles in 1915. Thoughtful, and well-respected by his peers as an able tactician, he is also popular with the rank-and-file for his caring attitude towards their welfare. Admiral Silverflint has recently assumed the overall command of the Bristol Fleet, raising his flag aboard the battleship "HMS Woolworth".
(2). CAPTAIN AUBREY ‘JINGO’ SINKIN
A stuffy and unimaginative dullard, Captain Sinkin owes his current command of the battleship "HMS Woolworth" to his father, the 4th Earl of Skegness, rather than any exploits in the Personnel (Filing) Department of the Admiralty where he has spent most of his uneventful career. A stickler for rules and regulations and lover of spit-and-polish, his (or rather his father's) desire to add much needed lustre to the family name has resulted in this, his first sea-going command.
(3). CAPTAIN RORY ‘BUGGRIT’
FOULBOTTOM, DSO
A crusty red-headed Irishman, renowned throughout the navy for his fiery temper and immoderate language, Captain Foulbottom is aptly named. He is a strict disciplinarian, who won his DSO for gallantry under fire while taking part in a raid on Bolshevik warships at Kronstadt in 1918. A fierce anti-Bolshevik since that campaign (at least, although possibly from the cradle), Captain Foulbottom was recently the subject of an ongoing and highly controversial court martial for expressing his political views, allegedly contrary to the "traditions of the service". His career saved by political intervention following the accession of Mosley to power, Captain Foulbottom then transferred to the newly founded (and thoroughly ideologically sound) BUF Naval Service, taking command of its first and most important ship, the escort carrier Charles A. Lindbergh (a gift to PM Mosley from "certain American well-wishers who desire to remain anonymous").
(4). CAPTAIN COLIN WOOD
The son of a grocer, Captain Wood joined the navy as a Boy Sailor, serving on Yangtse gunboats and fighting at the battle of the Falkland Islands in WW1. His natural charm and intelligence have made light of his humble beginnings, and combined with his dashing exploits and inspiring leadership have ensured his rapid advance through the naval hierarchy. Technically minded and interested in naval aviation from its very beginnings, Captain Wood has recently assumed the command of the Fleet Carrier, "HMS Argos".
(5). WING COMMANDER ARTEMIS MAYFLY
A somewhat unusual choice for this command, Wing Commander
Mayfly is an intelligent, indeed eccentric, free-spirit. An amateur naturalist and
explorer, he has sailed up the Amazon and was made an honorary chief by Dyak
headhunters while exploring Borneo. He first flew as a balloon observer in WW1,
but thereafter became a competent pilot and expert navigator. Wing Commander Mayfly commands the RNAS Air Wing aboard "HMS Argos".
(6). WING COMMANDER BRIAN ‘BUZZ’ BOMME
Wing Commander Bomme is a daredevil flyer who became an Ace with
the RNAS in WW1,being credited with 11 victories (and 6 downed balloons). He was one of the first
pilots to fly on and off aircraft carriers. Leaving the Navy due to service
cuts after the war, he travelled the world to fulfil his love of flying.
He was the first man to fly over Mt. Kilimanjaro, and then flew as a stunt pilot in
flying circuses in the USA. His strong anti-communist views and a chance
meeting in Chicago with the Marchioness Curzon of Kedleston (step-mother to Oswald
Moseley’s late wife, Cynthia, and also, for a while, Mosley’s lover), led to Brian Bomme
being invited to join the BUF Air Service, where his experience has proved
invaluable. Wing Commander Bombe commands the BUF Air Wing aboard the Charles A. Lindbergh.