A notorious incident: Flushed with the "single banana" success of his last raid on a Fyffes lorry (and perhaps rather envious of Colonel Comrade Professor Winter's recruitment of a whole section of Fyffes Motor Guard), Staff Captain Maynard duly ordered yet another stopped. On this occasion, however, the Government's luck ran out, and out of the back of van stepped none other than "Banana Man", the Fyffes corporate mascot. The corporate role of "Banana Man" was to sing, without cease, the corporate song - "Yes, we have plenty of bananas!" - but so badly that it caused the morale factor of his captors, Lord Scudamore's Legion, to drop severely. Colonel Comrade Professor Winters (Rob) kindly improvised the "banana song" (at full volume) in order to taunt Staff Captain Maynard (Alan) to distraction, with the result that a firing party was ordered:
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| Banana Man courageously faces a Government Firing Squad. He continues to sing as, unbelievably, every single rifle of the firing party misses...... |
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| ....only for the section's Light Machine Gun finally to do the necessary duty. Enraged by this obvious war crime, out of the adjacent scrub jump a party of fierce Morris Men... |
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| ...who proceed to beat Viscount Scudamore's troops with sticks and jangle their nerves with bells.... |
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| ....only to be wiped out in their turn as the (literally) "Blue Division" of Spanish Falangists come to the aid of Scudamore's troops. |
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| On the northern flank of the Government advance, matters proceed more peacefully. Here, a section of seamen (commanded by their Petty Officer) from the Royal National Lifeboat Institution are stopped by elements of the Hereford Auxiliary Reserve Division ("H.A.R.D."), while further east, Senior Captain Maynard, still brandishing his pistol.... |
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| delivered yet another inspiring speech, persuading the "Shredded Wheat Irregulars" to the side of HMG. |
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