AUTUMN BIG GAME 2018
"BRIDGE OVER TREBBBLED WATER"
THE GENERAL SITUATION
The Hereford 1938 AVBCW Campaign is so sweeping in geography (note 1), so fast moving in chronology (note 2), that it seems hardly any time at all since "The Great Cattle Rustle" in MORTIMER COUNTRY (see The Spring Big Game 2018 General Briefing and subsequent posts). Indeed, it isn't : our 1/60 scale campaign participants have hardly had time to draw breath and re-ammunition. It is but a fortnight or so later.
And a busy fortnight for all concerned.
The Not-so-Broad-Any-More Communist Front (prop: Comrade Professor Winters, aka Rob) remain in the north-west of the County, grouped in the general area around KINGTON, PRESTEIGNE, KNIGHTON and BRAMPTON BRYAN. Having previously and triumphantly broken through HM Government's long standing Siege Lines at KINGTON (see The Autumn Big Game 2017 Overview), the Red Horde are said to be "licking their wounds" after subsequently failing to capture WIGMORE HALL (notwithstanding an unprecedented 3:1 numerical advantage), the principal seat of "independent LDV" authority within Mortimer Country. Comrade Professor Winters has denounced such talk as "reactionary propaganda", preferring to claim that his fanatical troops are "licking only their captured ice creams" and engaging in such necessities as re-arming, re-provisioning, re-selecting and "re-educating" (the last not being confined to enemy prisoners, but including social democrats, socialist democrats, democratic socialists, trade unionists, ideological deviationists, and indeed anyone that does not fervently believe in the historically inevitable advance of the vanguard of the Red Revolution under the eternally wise leadership of Comrade Winters, ably "assisted" by Comrade Gollumroo (aka Roo) and the Comintern).
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| The "historically inevitable advance of the vanguard of the Red Revolution" at The Battle of Wigmore. A Communist Armoured Hedgerow Breaching Vehicle ("AHBV") leads the Reds into battle.... |
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| ....only to finish up crashed into the Wigmore Hall Cricket Pavilion, its crew and accompanying infantry destroyed, the AVHB itself set alight by "friendly fire" from a Communist 18pdr. Spies! Agent Provocateurs! Fifth columnists! A filthy capitalist plot, no doubt..... |
In the south-east, with his Strategic Command Post safely quartered in ROSS-ON-WYE, the Captain-General himself anxiously eyes his northern battlefront, situated roughly along the line HOARWITHY to WOOLHOPE. Morale has not quite recovered from his regrettable absence at the recent Anglican Raid into MORTIMER COUNTRY, nor its somewhat embarrassing cause. The Captain-General, his long anticipated "return to action" in MORTIMER COUNTRY having been trumpeted with enthusiasm from church pulpits across the County (in advance of the Spring Big Game 2018), instead found himself strangely absent from the field of valour. Some say that this was due to "inclement weather" (note 3) while others tell of the Captain-General's Field Column having to "ask directions of a local" as to the whereabouts of WIGMORE HALL, and being directed not into MORTIMER COUNTRY, but towards CENTRAL LONDON (note 4). Truly unfortunate that the Field Column asked directions of an opera loving agricultural type (or BUF spy). It is said that the Captain-General's "advance on Wigmore Hall" foundered somewhere around the outskirts of Royalist-held GLOUCESTER amidst the very distant strains of Gotterdamerung.....
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| Wigmore Hall, Wigmore Street, Marylebone. A concert hall, not a Herefordshire battlefield. After being so comprehensively misdirected, Captain-General Jermingham saw neither... |
In the north-east, with his Strategic Command Post safely quartered in LUDLOW CASTLE, the Bishop of Ludlow (aka Clive) mutters as to the slow progress of his famed (at least in his own diary) "A49 Thrust" southward towards HEREFORD. Having reached the deer park of BERRINGTON HALL itself as a result of the Battle of Berrington Approaches (see the Bishop's Broadcasting Service's account), the Anglican lines so remain there. The westward Raid into MORTIMER COUNTRY, undertaken partly to stifle the Not So Broad Communist Front's own advance and partly to assuage the love of "The Shropshire Swain" (former ward of the Bishop) for Miss Nemone Mortimer-Wagstaffe (step-daughter of Sir Barrington Patchpole KC, leader of the Mortimer Country LDV) proved not to be a success, but a mere distraction from the urgent business of capturing the important County town of LEOMINSTER. Notwithstanding the able leadership of the Bishop of Lichfield (aka Tym) and the somewhat less able leadership of the Shropshire Swain and his Anglican Staff College Advisers (aka Clive, again), the undermanned Ecclesiastical Raiding Parties failed to capture "the true" WIGMORE HALL, suffered (once again) the massacre of the Ludlow Light Lancers (reformed after their similarly comprehensive annihilation at The Battle of Eardisley), and generally escaped with only a few MORTIMER COUNTRY pigs and cattle...
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| The Ludlow Light Lancers. Re-formed. Re-Organised. Re-Painted. Re-Massacred. |
With their enemies thus momentarily(?) confused, if not yet confounded, are the County members of HM Government (prop. Lord de Braose, Governor and Warden of the Marches, aka JP) celebrating? Far from it. The British Union of Fascists (prop. Captain Arrowsmith aka Rich) is in utter confusion. Bad enough that Captain Arrowsmith has "gone AWOL" (as to which, the Capital & Counties Tearoom remains alive with gossip); bad enough that the newly promoted Group Leader Giles (aka Giles) has been distracted by lingering wounds and a rumoured re-location of barracks; bad enough that their loyal foreign allies, the Politically Confused Spanish Nationalist Monarchist Fascist Catholics (aka J), seem to have foundered somewhere in the Bristol Channel; the worst that the Government's wily diplomatist-in-chief, Major Straitt-Jackett (aka Alan), was "truly exploded" on active service in MORTIMER COUNTRY. It is said that, even if he survived the explosion, Major Straitt-Jackett will "never quite be the same" and may not even "return to operations" (other than of great length and difficulty, upon what remains of his person). With the leadership of the BUF in such disarray, and HM Government's battle lines in danger of contracting into the confined triangle of LEOMINSTER-HEREFORD-LEDBURY, to whom can HM Government (together with its various allied LDVs) look for battle leadership? The famous Lord Grover (aka JP, again), renowned for having once destroyed an enemy tank with nothing but his sword, seems to have returned to his country estates. That hard-riding, devil-may-care swashbuckler of a South African, Stokkies Joubert (aka Roo, again), seems to have scattered his commando and taken to a life of careless ease in the 'watering holes' of HEREFORD. After a desperate call for "substantial reinforcements" from the Hereford Shire Hall, Edward VIII has despatched merely one out of favour staff officer, the unknown quantity that is Lieutenant Everard (aka Alan, again). Perhaps the entire fate of Edwardian Herefordshire now depends upon a brand new hero, Major Sir James Barleycorn, MC (aka Tom) the undoubted victor of the Battle of Mortimer Country. Having held off three attacking Communist Platoons with only one Mortimer LDV Platoon throughout the course of that battle, can the newly promoted and freshly decorated Barleycorn MC demonstrate similar heroics in other parts of the County?
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| Barleycorn MC (aka Tom) at the conclusion of his unprecedented defensive fight at the Spring Big Game 2018. It is said that, of all the recent promotions and decorations in recognition of his achievements, none has given Barleycorn MC greater pleasure than the award of "The Wigmore Bunny" by a grateful local population (aka The Umpires, to general player acclamation) |
The Hereford1938 AVBCW Campaign thus remains delicately poised. As the Fleet Street military correspondents (and their bookmakers) have it : the game's afoot, and it's anybody's game.
But not anybody's family.
The redoubtable Sir Gilbert Hill (aka Doug), Herefordshire's answer to John D. Rockefeller/Alphonse Capone [insert somebody slightly controversial -ed.], is famously fond of his family.
And now his nephew, Chief Superintendent Ronald Bigsworth-Hill, (aka Doug, again) is in mortal danger. And still somewhere in MORTIMER COUNTRY.
The many avid readers of the Hereford1938AVBCW Blog will recall that, "but a fortnight ago", the gallant Bigsworth-Hill "answered the call of Wigmore" and rushed to the defence of Sir Barrington Patchpole KC and his family (aka JP, again) against the simultaneous assaults of the Communist Front, the Anglican League and HM Government.
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| A panoramic shot of the Wiltshire Police Flying Column, under the command of Chief Superintendant Bigsworth-Hill, gallantly preparing to defend Mortimer Country. |
The same legions of readers will further recall that the said Sir Barrington sensibly/infanously/treacherously then "did a squalid deal" with the forces of HM Government in order to repel the assaults of the Communists and the Anglicans upon his previously independent fiefdom. The precise terms of such "deal" may yet be in dispute (Sir Barrington beware), but the potential results for his former loyal ally and equally former BUF Storm Leader (2nd class, deserted), the very same Bigsworth-Hill, are much to be feared. The BUF have a particularly nasty, not to say final, way with deserters from their cause....and Ronald has consequently "gone into hiding".
Sir Gilbert is a criminal psychopath/respectable businessman sensible chap. He knows that to rescue his nephew, Ronald, from his hiding place in MORTIMER COUNTRY will be difficult. He knows that to do so, he will require all the might of his famed "Golden Valley Invincibles" and the full support of his historic allies, the Anglican League, together with his own new recruits, Chief Kansan O'Flynn and his tribal supporters. All that Sir Gilbert and his allies have to do, however, is draw HM Government forces towards them in the south of the County by crossing the RIVER WYE and advancing north. With his encirclement by the newly distracted HM Government forces thus broken, Chief Superintendant Ronald Bigsworth-Hill can then make his escape in good order...
"But that's impossible!" exclaimed the Anglican Staff Officer. "A contested crossing? Under fire? Assault boats and pontoon bridges? Why, the WYE is even now at full spate! With the recent rains, it's three times its usual width! Treble the difficulty! Even if it isn't impossible, it's never been done before - at least not outside of Hollywood!!!"
"Why honeychile, you're almost so right..." drawled Miss Sweetmeat, Sir Gilbert's very very personal secretary. "Lord de Braose, that deah boy, will never expect it. And that's just why it can be done....."
Can the Golden Valley Invincibles and their Anglican allies pull off their daring plan? Is the RIVER WYE ready for (homemade) assault boats and hurriedly assembled (converted Airfix) pontoon bridges? Will HM Government rally their presently almost leaderless troops and see off Sir Gilbert? Can Ronald Bigsworth-Hill be saved from capture and the gallows? Can Chief Kansan O'Flynn even swim?
All these dramatic questions, and more, can only be answered by participation in the AUTUMN 2018 AVBCW BIG GAME, "Bridge over Trebbbled Water", at the BURLEY GATE VILLAGE HALL, SATURDAY 13TH OCTOBER 2018, 10AM - 5PM!!!
Notes
Note (1) : not quite so sweeping, actually. With a few limited but necessary "historical" anomalies, the Hereford1938AVBCW campaign is actually confined to the boundaries of the County of Herefordshire, an area of 842 square miles.
Note (2) : the "chronology" of the Hereford1938AVBCW campaign has always been deliberately left rather vague, best expressed as "a year in real time roughly equates to a month in campaign time". With two "Big Games" a year, the campaign interval between "battles" is thus about a fortnight. The campaign has just passed its sixth anniversary "in real time", but the "starting campaign month" has never quite been articulated. If this timeline is considered generally acceptable, and May 1937 considered the starting point of both the national and County VBCW, we may not yet even be in 1938, but only preparing to celebrate Christmas 1937...scary.
Note (3) : it actually was. Strange now to think that the Spring Big Game 2018 took place against the background of heavy (and unseasonable) snowfalls, making long journeys very difficult and unpredictable. It is not only in the Hereford AVBCW that the weather plays unexpected tricks on the population....
Note (4) : full details of the historic Wigmore Hall in Central London can be found here.
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